Who doesn't love Queen?  What American hasn't rocked to We Will Rock You, or glared enviously at their triumphant adversaries as they sang We Are the Champions?  At the end of every MCTC victory, the marauders play just enough of Another One Bites the Dust to give you the idea...

so how is it that half the American Idol contestants picked songs that sucked?  Maybe it was only their versions that sucked, I don't know.

I was very hopeful when Bucky kicked the night off.  His version of Fat Bottomed Girls was fun and upbeat.  A perfect Bucky moment, reminding us all that despite not even being in the same talent ball park as the rest of the field, you probably wouldn't walk out of a bar he was playing.

I don't know what Ace sang.  I burst out laughing the moment he started and didn't hear a word.  Please, America, release me from this prison and send that boy home.
I got a hilarious email from Bill, which I won't reprint here because our parents read this.  Plus I don't want everyone who ever sees this to go "EWWW!!!"
(It had to do with Ace's future in gay porn and  imagining the men's room at a Queen concert. 
No, worse.)

Kelly and Paris both showed up in costume.  It was weird.  Kelly just proved that dressing a girl up like Joan Jett doesn't make her JJ.  Rather than showing how versatile these singers are, it just seemed like a night at the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Kathryn shrieked through her number and hit some clangingly awful notes.

Chris sang a dull song and looked disturbing in makeup.  Katie hadn't seen any Idol this year and when he came on, we told her he was our favorite.  She took one look at him and said "He's gay."  I explained that it was Queen night and that this was the first time we'd seen Chris in eyeliner and sequins.  they don't suit him.

Taylor was fun, but once you've seen Michael Buble do Crazy Little Thing Called Love, no one else can.

Elliot's music drowned out his performance.

When Kelly started Bohemian Rhapsody, Zack leaped out of his chair yelling "NO! No.  This is just wrong.  If I were a contestant and they said 'Do Queen', I'd have to sit this round out, because Freddy," he kissed his index finger and pointed towards heaven, " no one can do you justice!"
Zack was right.

 

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