In the middle of last winter, I was checking out at Sam's Club and the old guy guarding the door gave me an appraising look and said "You have pretty hair.  It's got a lot of body.  And it's shiny."

 I immediately decided to stop coloring my hair.  I was suddenly curious to see if people's reaction to me would change if I had a head full of gray instead of dark brown.  Would I look older?  Would they treat me like a grandma?  Would they offer to carry my groceries?  I had to know.

So after twenty years of Miss Clairol #120 every six weeks or so, I quit.  You really have to go cold turkey with hair color or it's not quitting, it's just forgetting.

I last colored it before Thanksgiving, so it's been a good six months.  I've had two cuts since then and all but the very tips are my now natural color, which turns out to be a pretty silver.  The tips are an extremely faded auburn.

Here's what I noticed; no one treats me any differently.  All the women I know have commented on how lovely my hair is and say that I should never color it again.

Women are notorious liars when it comes to each others' looks.  Think about it.  Does this dress make me look fat?  Do my knees look knobby?  Am I too old for this look?  The answer is always "yes" but we never tell each other that.  Some women will even sabotage their friends by recommending looks that do NOT  flatter.  I've never done it!  No, no, I didn't mean you.  You look great!

While no one treated me like a grandma (except for Charlie, who called me "Gramma" but he's not even two yet.  He doesn't count) I couldn't help but notice that while all the gals were raving about my new look, not one guy said a word.  Not a word.  I should've asked one of them if my gray hair made my butt look big, just for fun.

Finally, last week, Jay just looked at me and begged me to go back to "a normal color."

Not yet, sweetie, I'm not finished.

Now that my hair has been stripped down to it's real color, which is no color at all, I figured, why not have a little fun?  I want to find out if it's true that blonds have more fun!

So I picked up a box of Miss Clairol #104, medium golden blond.  Poured it all over my head yesterday.

I've never been blond.  In fact, I'm one of only two true brunettes in a family of blonds.  My sibling's haircolor ranged from white blond to sunny blond to six different shades of dishwater blond.  Then there was me and Bill, each with hair so dark that if it hadn't been for our blue eyes and freckles, Dad might have suspected that Mom bought us from the gypsies camping out in the archery range.  She always wanted twelve kids.  Who's to say she wouldn't have taken in a couple of strays she found in the park? 

I did do the Sun-In experiment the year I graduated from high school, but the color you get with Sun-in is to blond as hydrox are to oreos.  Rainman would never mistake one for the other.

The picture on the box of #104 showed a lass with lovely, sunny golden hair.  My hair doesn't look like that.  It's sort of a silvery...peach color.  Doesn't sound too appealing, does it?  Yeah....it's not good.

If you want a decent blond, you really have to go to a pro.

Elliot Spitzer is nodding his head and saying "True dat!"

Muzz is giving me a haircut this weekend.  I think I'll try some red next.

Don't worry, Jay.  I'll probably be brunette again by memorial day.

 

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